Roast of the Movie
Films, series, streaming platforms and cinema habits, reviewed with a little patience and a low tolerance for expensive nonsense. The archive covers what works on screen, what collapses under its own marketing and why the experience around a story can matter as much as the story itself. Expect spoilers to be handled carefully, franchises to answer for themselves and cinema sound to receive the respect it keeps invoicing us for.
Hope (2026): Korean Cinema Melts the Brain, Then the Heart
Hope starts slow, hides its monster, then erupts into 160 minutes of genre chaos, visual craft and Korean cinema reminding Hollywood how alive movies…
By Any Means: Racism, Revenge and the Law’s Dirty Hands
A roast of By Any Means, where 1966 Mississippi racism, a Black FBI agent and Mark Wahlberg’s mafia informant collide with revenge dressed as…
Resident Evil (2026): A Nervous Courier Carries the Horror
Resident Evil (2026) works because its nervous courier is funnier than the monsters, proving a franchise can entertain without a megastar or endless spectacle.
Practical Magic 2: Old Magic, New Curse, Same Old Cinema
Practical Magic 2 revives the Owens witches, Lee Pace and a 28-year-old spell, while ordinary cinema still struggles to feel much more magical than…
Runner (2026): Enjoyable, Familiar and Built for Streaming
Runner is enjoyable action with solid performances, but its familiar chase mechanics and soft opening make the sofa feel like its natural finish line.
Fall 2: Deadpoint – Heights Were Already Enough Trouble
Fall 2: Deadpoint makes a 4,000-foot plank walk terrifying enough, then adds drugs and extra plot tension as if gravity had somehow stopped doing…
Independence Day: Advanced Aliens, Basic Computer Problems
Independence Day returns to cinemas with 1990s charm, giant alien ships and a computer virus that makes interstellar travel seem the easier part to…
One Night Only: When the Sex Purge Goes Looking for Love
One Night Only turns premarital sex into an annual stampede, then quietly argues that finding one real connection can make the whole frenzy irrelevant.
Kiki’s Delivery Service: One Broom, More Magic Than Potter
A loving roast of Kiki’s Delivery Service, where one broom, a cat and a simple story create more cinema magic than entire wizard franchises…
One roast at a time
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